Tuesday I stayed home from work sick.
Not really sick, but I had an intense migraine and couldn't handle the pain.
The kind where the light made me puke, I was dizzy, shaking, nauseous....
You know, the best kinds! ;)
To update you all on a little of my past let me tell you a somewhat long....and struggling story.
I was in 13, dancing non-stop and about to go on tour for my church theatre group [Uprising].
I got sick.
Very suddenly & viciously.
I remember going to a final rehearsal for Uprising but sitting out watching the run through cause I was having intense stomach pains, bad headaches and was extremely dizzy. This was a Friday night; I went to bed after taking some Pepto Bismol and Excedrin.
 I woke early Saturday morning running to the bathroom having to throw up but didn't make it there.
Next thing I knew I was waking up in my dad's arms covered in blood.
I had passed out, seizured and thrown up everywhere.
I was throwing up blood.
I remeber grabbing my dad crying saying over and over I didn't feel good.
I was rushed to the ER which was conveniently located about 1/2mile from my home and going
90MPH- we got there quickly to say the least.
I passed out seizuring again as we were walking in the doors and don't remember much of being admitted or being taken care of right away.
I have glimpses of doctors working on me, inserting a tube up my nose and down my throat.
All I wanted was to go home to pack. I was supposed to be leaving for Florida in a few hours.
I was wheeled to the roof top where I was lifted into a helicopter and flown over to Phoenix Children's Hospital. I didn't know this at the time but my dad had a hard time leaving me. He begged to ride along for my sake but it just wasn't policy.The pilot promised to call my dad immediately upon landing at PCH as he did and my dad tells me now he couldn't be more thankful. Everytime this story comes up-- that's the first thing he talks about.
Phoenix Children's Hospital admitted me into the ICU [intensive care unit] where I had multiple blood transfusion and bags of plasma pumped back into my body. I had the tube up my nose and down my throat for 3 days while eating jello and popsicles; Day 4 I was moved to a normal room where I stayed for another day before being released.
While being there I had IV's in every vein they could find.
I was put under to have a scope done of the inside of my stomach.
I needed assitance showering and using the restroom.
I coulnd't sleep on my stomach with my arms bent [as I normally do] cause the damn IV would start beeping obnoxiously to alert the nurse something was wrong when all I wanted was some sleep.
It was the most exhausting, irritating and emotional week of my life.
I can say that for my family as well.
This all happened the week of my brother's 16TH birthday and the poor guy didn't even have his parents at the party; they were at my bedside day in and day out taking turns helping me with simple tasks of survival. We were so blessed to have family in town at arms reach to help out in every way. Sean's birthday party was thrown by grandparents and aunt's|uncle's and he still got his first car. :)
We later found out from the scope done that the lining in my stomach was eaten away by the Aspirin in the Excedrin. I was so busy with dance and theatre that life happened and I wasn't eating enough to soak up the drugs being consumed. I was put on medicine to coat my stomach [I gain about 15lbs] but it did it's job. I was told to eat tons of fatty, oily foods to stick to my stomach as well as a lining.
Then comes time to address the migraines and how to prevent them.
I started medicine to prevent them, to take when the on-set started, to take for pain and one for nausea.
I was dependent on prescription drugs.
I hated it. I felt defeated. Like I couldn't control my body and the way it felt and acted due to side effects. I was gaining weight, sweating so much, having mood swings, and passing out.... a lot.
Eventually I was taken off the prescriptions slowly as we changed my diet and cause I started birth control to help with hormones. I was migraine free for a while. But I still had them.
Here we are 9 years later and I am still suffering from daily pain. I was drug-free for 2 years with frequent migraines but I learned to deal with the throbbing and nausea; I didn't want to be dependent on prescriptions anymore.
July 2011 I submitted to starting a prevenative medicine again.
I didn't think it made much of a difference but when I've forgotten to take my pill I deal with 2-4 days of being in bed crying from the intense pain, missing work and feeling completely miserable.
I'm embarrassed by this controlling my life.
I never told my husbands family about my migraines until they mentioned to me that it seemed like I never wanted to be around them or never seemed to enjoy their company. It's not the case at all but I try hard to fake it and act as if I'm not struggling with pain. I've learned to be open and honest about how I'm feeling.
This isn't something I can control
& they still love me with or without migraines.
As does my own family and friends. I am very blessed to have an understanding environment.
My mother-in-law has been a saint with sending me remedies or options for helping.
Just on Sunday she told me about Feverfew which I was so excited to try.
Having dealt with a migraine so recently that kept me from work, I now have ordered it and am dying waiting to try it! She also ordered me a Baltic Amber bracelet which is known to help with pain.
I'm optimistic that things will change.
I'm have hope that God will work this out in my future.
This was a pretty deep post for me as I don't feel comfortable disclosing this imformation. It was a dark time in my life and I still struggle daily with what I went through, what my family went through and how to take on the next migraine I am bound to have. I know I'm not the only one who has dealt with hard times in life and I pray we can only learn and grow from those experiences we do have.
It's all part of the plan.
So all in all-- I want to thank all of you for opening your hearts to this worry of mine.
If any of you have migraines and great remedies that work for you; I am all ears.
You can contact me here or by commenting.
Happy Weekend my dolls!
Leaving you with this sweet gem:

Oh, Elle.
You make my heart smile.